I first heard this said by Dr. Maya Angelou, whom I adore, many years ago (probably 25) and it has always stuck with me. In fact, it’s become something that I live by personally and encourage clients to remember when they’re afraid.
Clients come to us for many reasons; feeling increased anxiety, difficulty getting over a bad relationship, unsure of what to do or where to go. In all of the reasons women seek therapy, the theme we see over and over is FEAR; fear of leaving, fear of staying, fear of trying, fear of giving up, fear of change.
As we’ve determined before, anxiety is fear on crack, so it makes sense that when you’re feeling fear, you’re usually also feeling some anxiety. This is where we come in. We’re the fear slayers! Seriously though, we’ve fought this battle over and over and know how to defeat it.
And that’s why this cool — albeit brief — mantra comes in handy: leap and the net will appear. What does this mean? Well, simply put, act now before you see the result because things always have a way of working out.
Unsure of what your boss will say when you ask her for a raise? Ask anyways! Afraid of what his family will say if you divorce their son even though you’ve been miserable for years? Do it anyway! Scared to send in that application for the course you’ve been eyeing forever even though you know in your heart it will change your life? Send it in!
I am sure you’re thinking, ‘how easy to say that.’ I get it. Things are always easier to say than do. But here is what I’ve learned: Every time I’ve taken a chance, a risk, made a jump … it ALWAYS worked out. Every. Single. Time.
Now, did it work out the way I had envisioned it each time? Nope. But most of the time, it was even better than I could have ever imagined it. The best way to control your fear is to make it your property – to take ownership and decisive action.
Successful people will affirm this over and over. They take risks and actions even when they’re unsure of the result. Success is the direct result of multiple failures and imperfect actions done over and over. Repeat that again: Success is the direct result of multiple failures and imperfect actions done over and over.
Once you take action, it’s like the universe has made you some steps to show where you need to go next, illuminating your path. The extra good news? We will be walking next to you while you’re doing this brave, hard work of creating the life you deserve.
So my loves, when you’re on the edge of an important decision (or even a simple decision) and you feel paralyzed by all the ‘how’s’ and ‘what if’s,’ walk to the edge of the cliff, hold your nose, close your eyes and freaking DO IT! LEAP! We got you!
Here are a couple of books we recommend if you need further proof that this process works:
- “Do It Scared: Finding the Courage to Face Your Fears, Overcome Adversity, and Create a Life You Love” by Ruth Soukup
- “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyways” by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D
And as always, we are here for you when you are ready. Make an appointment by calling our administrative goddess at 301-690-0779 ext. 700 or emailing firstname.lastname@example.org.