How to Stop Your Worrier (Not Warrior) Brain

We get it. There is a lots to worry about right now in our uber-stressed, tense world. I mean, how could you NOT be stressed with so much hostility, division and hate running rampant everywhere we look? Since most of us and our clients are struggling with anxiety and worry, we wanted to address one of the most asked questions we get in our sessions: “how do I stop my constant worrying?”

We all know how sucky constantly worrying about something can be, especially if you can’t seem to “turn it off.” We get it! 

We’ve learned some tricks and tips over the years we thought we’d pass along to you: 

Worrying, as all thought patterns, are a HABIT. This means that just like any other habit, it can be broken by paying attention to what you’re worrying about and when. Gathering information is super helpful right now. What are your themes or your common worries? What is running in a constant loop in your brain all the time? 

Next, set aside some time each day to “worry.” Any time you want but most people find it’s helpful to do it after the workday and well before bed, so let’s say, 5 p.m. Allocate 10 to 15 minutes to sit down and let your worries fly! You can write them down if you want or just sit there and let them come in rapid succession. Now is the time to worry as much as you want but ONLY for the designated time, so set a timer on your phone and follow it! Once your time is over, that’s it. NO MORE! 

Now comes the difficult part: it’s time to organize your worries and analyze them. So, gather your intel, make lists according to topics (work worries, home worries, kid worries), then start to look these lists over. Is there more in one category than another? Start there. 

Taking these lists, we want you to start going down the rabbit hole with each worry. Yes, that’s right. Go there! Go to the worst-case scenario … it’s helpful to get comfortable with the worst possible outcome because this is where the power is. Once you know the worst possible scenario, the power of it frightening you is starting to loosen! Do this over each day until the worrying subsides and you’ll begin to see a big difference. 

We know this can be difficult to do on your own, which is why we are here! We help women and girls every day, all day (it’s our jam!). And even better? Tackling anxiety is our superpower! So, if you need some extra help in figuring out where all this stuff is coming from and how to stop constantly worrying, we are your tribe! Head to to self-schedule with one of our rock-star therapists, easily and RIGHT NOW! 

Let’s get you back to good. Remember: we got you!  

DEBORAH DULEY is a licensed social worker in the state of Maryland. She has a BS in social work from Bowie State University and a Masters of Social Work from Howard University, Washington DC, as well as thousands of clinical hours and continuing education. She is a certified Stepfamily Foundation Counselor and is ASIST trained in suicide intervention. In addition Deborah is trained in divorce and custody mediation. Deborah is the founder and owner of the counseling practice Empowered Connections LLC, located in the heart of Leonardtown Maryland and the facilitator of her new therapy program “10 Sessions to Better Self-Esteem.” Deborah has over 25 years of experience working with women in many capacities such as activist, domestic violence counselor, and crisis interventionist. As the “women’s therapist,” she is passionate about working with women and teen girls. She integrates her knowledge of mental health issues and her life experiences to assist them in increasing their self-esteem, decrease anxiety & depression symptoms and tackle a whole host of personal issues that women struggle with.